Anugerah

love is subjective! it can be to anything, anyone and sometimes it can be beyond of mind. indeed, just look back how many stories about love which we can conclude as romance, lovely, memorable, nostalgic or i would include as tragic. some find the ending well, some met the trouble, some faced regrets and some got a failure. And I specifically refer to human love at this time. 'sejak topik nie hebat dibualkan antara sahabat-sahabat'.

i spoke to a few friends who told me their love story and some of them asked for the opinion and advice. i could give them some but i still doubt myself for giving them the real and clear explanation since i am not really a doctor love, or i can say that i am not good in handling this kind of love matter. don't get me wrong by judging me for ignoring your complaint but take it as my flaws cos i really not so perfect in this field! but I still can try to be a motivator whenever you need me to listen to yours.

Here, when someone knows love, will they understand what this love for? what this love meant? have you ever asked yourself? beep .....~~speak to your heart~~ you know better than what people might say!

its a gift! its Him who gave this gift for every of His slaves. but;

first; we misused this feeling.

second; we forgot the purpose of this gift.

third; we blind for every happy moment we had.

.....; we strayed from niat 'nawaitu'

....; we almost far from love but play in 'nafsu' (lust)

....; we lost the love but we won the stain.

don't look others but refer to own self what have we reach in this love. being capable with everything without a limitation and based on hakikat semakin kita hampir pada cinta, semakin kita lupa anugerah dari Allah. when lust take place the niat sink. making a mistake is not the end of everything but turn back with taubat and doa and make returning to Him is a best way!

don't think of romeo and juliet, don't think of uda dan dara. they were from a different kind of love which is a   role play for some entertainment and that was a typical love story to make people understood the worldly love it is!

back to basic; remember when we in primary school, ustazah selalu cerita tentang kisah-kisah nabi. make a our love as cinta Nabi Muhammad kepada Siti Khodijah.

this is what He want us to appreciate His anugerah. everybody deserves this anugerah and He never lock any of His slaves' heart from putting it inside but it is us who put it high in a wrong place. 

those failed find love there is no regrets but istiqamah cos He said 'I have a better plan' and He want to give a perfect love perhaps. kerana Dia telah menjadikan setiap dari kita berpasang-pasangan. don't blame Him but closed to Him. 

but, 

take this as renungan; 

mungkin kita lupa untuk melakukan suruhanNya dan tidak meninggalkan laranganNya.

Mungkin kita sentiasa jauh pada petunjuk dan hidayahNya

or,

maybe we never love Him but we still beg for His anugerah! nauzubillah

maybe! maybe! maybe! -bertanya pada diri sendiri, how many amal ibadah had we done sepanjang kita hidup. how many syukur kita pohon. its all in your head!

Love is a gift. Love is priceless! Love is indah! Love is perfect!

so, follow His way and you will find the true love. Love of iman and taqwa, love of redha and syukur, love of ikhlas (sincere).

find Him, you will find love... insyaallah

sincere,

dieba

Pray

He is the Greatest!

He is the Greatest!

He is the Greatest!

yesterday i visited one of my old friend in HKL. she was admitted due to stroke and was unconscious since 2 weeks ago. the moment i heard about the news, i'm totally deny it from my heart. how come the active lady with the young age got sick on that way! I deny it though i understood! but soon after taking a breath and listen to the explanation from friends, this is His plan! a fate ~~~ sober ~~

i stared through her face, she was struggle with her life and i cry in heart. This is how He test her, this is how she have been through, this is how i learnt: no matter how old you are, no matter how strong you in building your muscles, no matter what status you have, no matter. no matter!

 He is Almighty, He is the Greatest!

 Subhanallah.

i pray her for her health and her safe!

May Allah with her. ameen

Allahu YarA'kum

دمتم في رعاية الله وحفظه (May you forever be under God's care and protection) "dumtum fii ri3aayatillaahi wa HifDHih"

The aura

truth! 

sometimes this operational mind system need to be rest from any exceed input.

I admit, this period make me blur due to time constrain and mentally tired..

so that, there is no post for a while until  mind state stable and the aura of fingers to be running come back :)

Deeds

“Winning is a habit. Watch your thoughts, they become your beliefs. Watch your beliefs, they become your words. Watch your words, they become your actions. Watch your actions, they become your habits. Watch your habits, they become your character.”

never less

one time i stared at my screen there was nothing change; the unread emails. wasn't me been forgotten nor busy also to ignore; however it is you who stop sending me a single word. or could i say the failure of connecting the line in the blue ocean. 'sedapkan hati'

meanwhile, this thought brought to worries and sad. subhanallah. seems news had take place my thought over you; the unsafe day you have been through in your sailor and the unhealthy yours in your last messages.. naudzubillah 'may Allah with you'. 

sometimes in this tears i pray you for more pink in health,

I pray to Him

to keep our fate 'jodoh' never last till He set us to be free 'mati'

i pray Him to preserve our 'iman' (faith) so we won't go astray and obey to what rules He stated, put the evil 'syaiton' as a musuh yang di keji away from making us go 'maksiat' and 'sumbang mahram' (vice and incest) and not between of us; not even in a seconds of our steps.

I pray Him

if you're the one He choose for me in the first place; keep you stay and i lock it good till the day you said

AKU TERIMA NIKAHNYA,

but you must face Him,

put Him in the first place before me,

and you must face my abah...'full stop'

I pray Him,

 never make this love last,

insyaAllah.   

exam

yet another 2 papers to go before end the 1st semester. despite the never ending study, the never enough sleep, the over consumption of supper and caffeine, the agony of realizing the 2 chapters you read had only 1 question in paper, the spot question you stress out haven't appear like you wish. errhh; there are still a lot of things i love about exam.

here is my first semester for this first year;

my classmate, my junior, my super duper senior and now we together in the same class

my room mate which we always exchage ideas and argue..grr

the last minute study..uhuk uhuk

i will miss the moment when we were together instead; move one step to another life with family :(

and exams are where friends get together

supporting one another

and building a stronger ukhwah fillah

insyaAllah

and a whole lot more gained.

praying the past exams for us had been nothing more than help us strengthen our

IMAN & AMAL

insyaAllah

p/s: though we were sometimes give up and frustrated on the weakness and losing energy during this studying period but we believe in 'hikmah' and 'janji' (promise) Him kepada hambaNya yang berusaha dan 'bertawakal'. we gain the strength from our longest smile and holding hands.. ameen

Match and Right

staring at those timetable on my desk, it's totally give my head spinning. well, got lot of plan instead of the work list that haven't been done for quite long ago. seriously, time so quick and i'm running out to the due date. oh yadda yadda.... whatever my feeling right now, i need to ignore since books and papers are primary at this moment.

er... should i stop writing? upp, let me finish the entry first and make it this quick then i'll continue revision.

meanwhile, my friends spoke about married, since one of our house mate going to married soon, and some of them are preparing for their engagement, 'Err nak cakap dia pon nak kahwin jugakla tue'. hah, but i haven't plan anything at all. okay lets get back to the point. i have seen many of my friends got married at the young age. some at the time after school and have a few children now. and some of them is just waiting for their day. its really wonderful when seeing how excited them in preparing for their dream wedding. some wanted it to be like wedding of the year, some said wanna it just be an average and let the 'wajib' come first. well, its from their opinion. but some, are stress out of preparing the wedding. sometimes, she said she wanna give up in planning since the family also won't give any hands. well, i wouldn't know much but advice is useful for her for making the heart go strong and make the plan to be a better than what she expected and felt at this moment.

i haven't experienced this kind of plan. maybe yes, but its long time ago when i was a little girl in my uncle's wedding and i am not actively involved in others wedding too and even other relatives since we are too busy in work and everything done by wedding planner. my family, i have a sister which is busy with her job and haven't ready for the further stage, so we haven't experienced. but i believe it must be so meriah and huru hara with mom and aunts busy with plan and some of the talks.. well, mothers' talk.....

dream of a beautiful wedding and have a last end with partner. I dream too! i have quest some of my friends, how life after marriage? they reply me in smile and it shows how much indah and bahagia and especially when they are waiting for the first baby to come. and suddenly i laugh in deep heart. can't believe, my friend going to be a mother. how quick time fly leaving everything behind. and i sometimes miss the moment when we in school. but i know, time never go back... that what my sayang fara always told me. and she's going to be a mother too.

i ever thought this sometimes, how people get divorce? how people curang with their partner while they are the one who choose to marry with? urm.. but i respect people who keep their love till end. i ever since much much in Geri's. How loving the husband sitting besides wife even though he knows the wife wouldn't know he was there. He keep waiting till the wife go. i love seeing them. and i want the same someday! :( the same in a better moment with my love.

i thank Him for giving me 'heart' which i can fall in with someone right, with someone He made for me. this feeling go right cos every time love come, it makes me closest to Him.

Ya Allah, satukanlah hatiku

dengan iman, taqwa, dan keyakinan kepadaMu.

Jadikanlah aku suami soleh yang sentiasa memimpin dan isteri solehah yang sentiasa membantu.

Mewahkanlah rezekiku dan kurniakanlah aku zuriat yang beriman, bertaqwa dan beramal soleh.

Semoga kehidupanku dilimpahi Nur Iman

dan dipenuhi Al-Muwaddah dan Ar-Rahmah didunia dan diakhirat,

Amin Ya Rabbal Alamin

Percaya pada Qada dan Qadar Nya. Kerana dia telah tetapkan setiap dari kita pasangan supaya kita dapat membimbing antara satu sama lain.

Siapa yang paling bisa Memaklumi, Memaafkan dan Memotivasi kita ke arah yang lebih baik Insya Allah itu jodoh kita

Doa dan munajat adalah jalan yang terbaik.

wallahualam....

Deeper

" Ya Allah,

sampaikan salam rinduku

kepada ......,

sehingga aku menjadi kerinduannya..

Amin. "

doa nabi yusuf kepada zulaikha. :)

sometimes

I may be not a good one but I jump back to be a better one

On pen and papers

I am nervous! I technically at this time had very severe anxiety against my final examination.

maybe after leaving school for quite long, that is why my heart keep beating and mind contained of worries.

Well, I am busy now. it's time to start the revision and try answering a few past year papers. seriously i am terribly afraid of facing the exam after few years left. Remember those time back when i really stay up the whole night and studying so hard meanwhile, at this time i just have only 4 hours/day to finish the study. plus with the lethargic face and mental tiredness. i don't think i could have done finishing the study well. 

Hurm but i learnt from the words 'never give up! i still struggle in completing my revision. Finally yes, i did it with 'sabar' (patience) and 'berkat' (bless) by mama's and  abah's doa.

okay, got a go... need to get some sleep and will update more pada masa lapang. or after my exam done!

Pray for my best. Insya Allah...ameen :)

Towards His Jannah

each step i am making in my life brought me to a better way although sometimes i astray from the right with my own flaws but turn back by 'iman' (faith) and 'hidayah' (guidance) from Him.

Alhamdulillah

another day to blink eyes and 'syukur' (thank) Him for making me alive and have a great sunshine with a cool air. A step further for 2012 after leaving such a beautiful 2011 with bliss instead of memorizing the bitter harder struggle in life. But, the strength He gave me more than the allegation that He planned.

my friend asked me in his emails, what did I do for celebrate the new day and what did I plan for this coming day and until next 365 days. I told him, my plan still same. I still continue my work, my study, live in the same house, doing the same routine and have a 'lepak' day like the same as I am with my sayang sayang.

But, there is still something adding in. Like other people say; "saya nak ada azam baru tahun ni.", or speak to the inside "apa azam baru aku". and i would say the same in mine..haha... 'nak jugak tue'. Despite in 'hakikat', our resolve remain the same even time fly over the day by day. what we wish for every single day was thing that every moment we never left. It is to be with Allah! That always be in heart and every soul. How could we be with Him? Death!

Speak about death, are we ready for the time. i am sorry, this is quite typical as about Qada and Qadar. Hidup, Ajal dan Jodoh! everything had set by Him, as a slave, we 'redha' (accept) what He planned for us. But, He is not as cruel as He set for us, He gave us a chance to make everything go perfect and better than what we want. He gave us hand to recite a doa, He asked us to kneel Him so that He remains in soul. That was good enough to live in His world and keep alive besides death, but do we obey to it? Some did, some don't! have you ever wonder why?

Because we never thought of His Jannah. because we forget the responsible in our deeds toward Him. That is why, nothing lead us to His Jannah. and not even a flash of His Jannah.

one friend had told me how she afraid of facing death. neither me felt that as a surprised cos i felt the same either. others, may giving you the same words cos we never know how we end our breath. Is Him to decide. and it us to make our end to Jannah.

2012, may be different a little but maybe huge as we no idea how He going to set. But I always pray to Him to make everyday in further to be better and bless. Insha Allah.. So there is no wrong to make a wishlist, you may do hundred for what you had listed but remember to never put Him aside. In any matter!!!!

I bless by Him for fulfill me His gift. Family, Friends, Health, Work, Study and the main Life! Wealth! wouldn't be primary but still needed as long as no go deflected! Ameen.

Here i leave you with a few link which I share you some of my reading..Jannah points, khutbah, and Jannah.

-Happy New Year-

 Sincere,
dieba

Interpretation

liking someone doesn't mean you have to be lovers, sometimes you just have to be friends

For Them

Just a lil while watch this video...so sweet....